wild woman cacophony

Disrobe, dismantle, disarm, dissolve.
All of nature is turning.
Disrobing, dismantling, disarming, dissolving.
We are not separate from this process of Life becoming Life.
This is the great turning and returning of the Mother.
The dance of life, death and rebirth.
Our cells know this rhythm and lead us blindly,
pulling us directly into the darkness,
into the intimate territory of our Soul.
We are shedding the skins of worn out lives and exhausted ways of living.
We are returning, remembering and revealing the seed of life
nestled deep within the contours of our native shape.
What was the shape of your face before you were born?

I Am disrobing, taking off the costumes, the masks, the roles.
The props used for playing life trail behind me.
I Am dismantling structures, stories, carbon copy mechanisms, ancestral garbage.
I Am disarming, removing the shields, the braces and the bracing, the body's armor, dropping the weapons of the disembodied mind, the arsenal of poison used to inject truth with lies.
I Am dissolving, dissolving into union, dissolving all separation, dissolving a self that thinks itself other than.

I am exposed.
I am naked in the rain,
shivering, quivering.
White skin, dark night.
Hair sopping wet, clinging to my face, my shoulders.
Wind whipping my body, water pelting my head.
I open my mouth to speak and no sound comes.
I am screaming on the inside,
I am silent, no one can hear.
I am the Divine Feminine rising.
I am the Innocent Erotic returning.
I am naked.
I am exposed.
I kneel down on the wet earth.
The smell of fallen leaves and damp earth greet me.
I lay my belly on the belly of the Goddess,
I feel her pulse life into my being,
through my navel she enters me
this life force, this Christ force
She enters me, she enters my soul
impregnating me with the seed of life
She is sweet ambrosia
She is honey wine intoxication
She is filling me with life force
She is infusing my cells
She is taking me to her breast
to drink nourishment that
will warm me forever.
I awake out of my trance,
lying naked, wet and sweaty
on the dance floor.
It is dark and night has come
Where are the other dancers?
Who was the madman shaman that
came and drummed my heart into
this frantic shaking?
I pull myself to my knees,
my eyes squint in the darkness
I sense the wildness around me
the danger and the delight
of naked living lurks around
each and every corner,
waiting to take me captive,
entangling me in the fire
until I dissolve
into the Lover.
She is rising.
She is home.

Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide...and even if I could, tonight I don't want to.
I am slowly becoming accustomed to my own nakedness, my own porousness,
my availability to life --
the deep sorrow and grief, the emptiness, the void, the delight, the joy, the bliss.
I am coming into deep union with life,
No longer playing games of separation.
From Self, God and other.
I am becoming a Lover with all Lovers.
I am touched and touching.
I am breathed and breathing.
I am erotic, exotic, ecstatic awakening.
I don't remember the face of yesterday
I don't remember the levers I pulled
or the games I played to avoid
such rapturous and heart breaking intimacy.
I am being pulled, I am being taken.
I must have bought a ticket for this ride, yet I don't recall when.
Grace is creating my living now.
I pray that I finally and completely let go of all
that does not lead me to Love, to God, to Truth.
Strip away all that does not serve this silent awakening
Strip away all of the lies,
Like leaves falling steadily and ever so lightly,
I let go, I let go, I let go.

Today I learned again, that we deeply need each other.
We need each other to fly, to soar.
We need each other to move across the threshold into greater living and greater loving.
We need one another to find respite and balance in the chaos of Kali.
We need each other to hold us, lift us, relieve us of our internal nightmares -- the monkey's mind unleashed.
We need each other to come into joy, to find aliveness,
to revel in the moment to moment unfolding
of the ruby precious gem of who we really are.

I danced in wild abandon today...I danced naked.
I danced with one eye looking outward and one eye looking inward.
This is the dance that my Beloved Vinn demanded of me...evoked from me...
The mystic in action, the sacred in the real, the soul embodied.

I am the Sacred Feminine Rising.
She is rising. She is coming home.
I am rising. I am coming home.

I invite you to join me on this magic carpet ride.
The price? Your life and your living, your essence unfolding with wild abandon.
Destination? Ecstatic heart union, love's fiery embrace, naked heart living.

Let this be our mantra as we surrender to the turning and returning...
disrobe, dismantle, disarm, dissolve.

And so it is. Ameyn.