A Voraciously Hungry Heart

I am voraciously hungry...a soul hunger...I think we all are...I know this to be true when I penetrate the armor -- mine and yours -- and discover this open, beating, longing, loving heart that is so hungry for an experience that is real...that is intimate, that is immense, that is intense. We are a people of hunger, starving for real connection, authentic community, sacred ritual and real experiences of the Divine in the real, day to day experience of life. We are hungry for our own sacred rhythm...for a pace that expands the heart and opens the mind and liberates the spirit. We are hungry for the organic movement of our bodies -- not the frenetic, linear, forced forward motion that our culture has rewarded and held up as the American Way to success and happiness. We are a people hungry for nurturing, for reciprocity, for receptivity, and right nourishment. We are hungry for ourselves, we are hungry for each other. We are souls starving and we don't even recognize that we are...we are hungry and we settle day after day for "fast food" nourishment, experience and intimacy. We are a culture of perfection, of striving and of force. We are a culture of the over identified, over exemplified, over indulged masculine (and please be certain that I am not talking about gender). We are a culture that is killing the feminine, that is suppressing her...we have in our core a deep hunger for her and yet we fight her. I feel this deep within me and I see it in our world...I see it in my brothers and sisters...the way has been forgotten...I am hungry for the balance, for the graceful and powerful blending and blessed union and communion of the feminine and the masculine in myself, in my core and in the world.

Is this too intense...is this too honest...does this make you fidget when you read it...well, it does me as I write these words...I feel the tension in my shoulders and the deep rage of what has been suppressed, repressed and held in for so long...for so very long. I hear the deep guttural cries of the Sacred She calling from the Deep...longing for liberation...for a full return to graceful wildness and spilling open-heartedness. She will return. She has to if we are to survive, if we are to begin again...

I hear the voices of the "nice girl" and the "minister girl" wondering what some of my new thought affirming friends might think about what I am "creating with my word." And yet this truth of this Sacred Soul Hunger is real...isn't it...when you read these words something resonates doesn't it...it is undeniable. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Fuck the nice girl and the minister girl...how about I do something real and true for once in my life...how about I do something that stirs my soul and gladdens my heart...that sweetens MY life (and then naturally and organically sweetens the life of others)...? How about just being here now...without the frenzied striving for perfection so I wont have to feel my own void, my own nothingness...how about not trying to perfect, create and accomplish just to justify my existence here on the planet or somehow balance the Garden of Eden shame that accompanies us into our birth...we most be covered in our native state. Screw that...no more! Oh she is bubbling this morning and yet I vow to not silence her this time and ask her to settle down...to find another more mature way to express herself that won't ruffle any more feathers...God forbid she suffers another brokenhearted experience of being left, of being crucified. Better to play it safe right? No, the only safety these days...the only true refuge for the Soul is in unguarded, dilated, open heart expression.

I feel the urge to go back...read and edit...perfect...I dare myself to just hit publish and leave it be...I dare my self to just leave myself be...let myself be. I dare you to just let yourself be...truly for Christ's sake. This is the awakening of the Sacred Heart...this is the second coming of the Christ...this is what is being birthed....the Christ seeds which hold the beautiful and blessed union of the Divine Masculine and the Divine Feminine...have been conceived...let us not abort this holy birth...let us love each other into full bloom.

I read this paragraph this morning in Marion Woodman's book "Addiction to Perfection: The Still Unravished Bride" -- which gave me a clue about why the Sacred Heart Sanctuary is being created and what it's purpose in the Great Death and the Great Birth might be...

"Many people in our society are being driven to addictions because there is no collective container for their natural spiritual needs. Their natural propensity for transcendent experience, for deep ritual, for connection to one another and to some energy greater than their own, is being distorted into addictive behavior."

So this is the hunger...this is my hunger...two weeks ago at the end of a bodywork session I was asked, while lying on the table, to check in..."I am hungry," I whispered with tears in my eyes, "I am so very hungry."

Beloved Mother Father God, Christ Yeshua...I thirst, I hunger...We thirst, We hunger...bring us into your way, reveal to us the path of soul nourishment so that we might be true and holy vessels of your love and your Divine presence on this earth and in our bodies. Thank you for the privilege of embodiment and for this call to be your eyes, your heart, your hands, your feet. May our collective hunger lead us to you, to one another...may it lead us home. Amen.

Kombucha Blessings,
Anakha