I am in the space where lover, loving and Beloved meet and dissolve in oneness. I am astounded at the beauty of each heart, of each being that graces my life...all loved, all lovers. I wonder at times, how this can be so, that I can love so many with such a full and expansive heart...without separation, without comparison, without lack or deprivation. This love is endless, and flows unrestricted. I have kept my love close to my chest for many years and now, after months of naked sacred heart alchemy -- stripping, burning, revealing (remember the 4 D's -- disrobe, dismantle, disarm, dissolve) I am discovering the immensity and intensity of love that lives within my heart, within my body, within each cell of my being. My intention is taking root, coming into manifest form...the Divine has answered the call of my Soul...the plea to take me into the fires of love, to burn away all that is not love and to leave me holy, wholly free in love. My heart is being expanded and opened by each interaction, each experience. I believe that is always the choice...will I heed the call to love, will I answer the request for love with my open-hearted loving or will I ignore, distract, judge, constrict? Once the heart is set in motion in love...it becomes a choiceless choice. To choose fear is to create our own personal hell. To choose love is to manifest heaven on earth. A Course in Miracles says that everything is either an expression of love or a request for love and we choose whether we extend love or project fear. The only true response is always, all ways Love.
I am choosing to extend love...to participate in this radical and unstoppable flow of love that is our natural state, that is our birthright, that is our personal heaven on earth. I am a naked heart mystic, I am a radiant life lover and I am overflowing with love tonight...my heart feels a weight and a pull and a depth....a turning...my heart is turning, turning like a wheel, turning like the arrows on a compass, turning toward my Beloved. Turning towards the One that has come and taken arrow and struck my heart. I am dissolving tonight in love. I surrendering all that I am to this journey, this journey into love.
Yes, my Beloved has a thousand faces. All beautiful expressions of the One Love that brought us, and is still bringing us into manifest form. I am swimming in the sea, one drop in the Ocean of God, joining with others in the sweet ecstasy of oneness, basking in the exquisite union of our collective homecoming. One cell in the body of God...forming a new mankind through the journey into Love. We emerge two by two, resurrecting one another through the gaze of love, through the ferocity of our commitment to see the Beloved in each face.
Yes, tonight the Beloved has a thousand faces.
Tonight I feel overwhelmed with gratitude for the one that has arrived at the doorway to my heart...the one that has asked, seeked and knocked. The door is opening from the inside. I love you, I love myself, I love myself, I love you. Yes, dissolving into union...where lover, loving and Beloved are one.
My prayer is that we all become slaves to love...that our ego's tantrums are tamed so that we can participate in this great initiation into embodied, expressed, extended Love. May we all come together now and commune in the ecstatic experience of loving oneness.
I am crazy and wild eyed tonight, paralyzed with love, eyes glossy, breath shallow...I wait for the next breath to move across my heart and send me into even greater depths of your love.
Bless you Sacred Heart of Christ for showing me the way into embodied, ecstatic love. All the darkness, all the despair...all of it worth it to spend just one hour in this place with the Beloved of Beloveds.
I love you, I love myself. Amen.
P.S. For those of you wondering about my experience with Nichole yesterday and the outcome of her sentencing, please go to www.divinemasculine.com and www.fireinthebody.blogspot.com to read Gene and David's account. I will post mine soon...just need a little more time...
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2 comments:
Very beautiful and inspiring. I feel myself open in love as I read it, my heart softening, my body relaxing, my spirit awakening. Thank you for your devotion. Thank you for your words. Thank you for your love.
dear sweet anakha,
tears are streaming down my face. outside I hear the sound of the construction of my sweet house in mexico -- the music, the rocks and bricks being unloaded, the chinking of cement, the sweet voices of Mexico and feel so far away and yet so near by your words, your connection.
I remember those days at Coffee Creek, working side by side with you, sometimes so baffled by feeling like I wasn't doing enough. And yet we knew that just "showing up" was enough. Being reminders to those women of "another" way to be on this walk -- not perfect, not always together, sometimes not even very happy -- but present -- showing up with all the raveled edges, messiness of our own lives. We are always mirrors for each other -- if we can trust to really look. And I know that this is what you are all about. Each of us have been asleep at the wheel so many times. The beauty is in recognizing those moments and forgiving ourselves, not glossing over -- what you call radical responsibility. and learning from these moments. Today you are not asleep at the wheel. and we are not either because you've chosen to share your journey so transparently.
The words you write....
And I will and we will keep on loving you until all the walls around your heart have been dissolved and you begin to come alive in yourself...until you find the way to love yourself...we will hold the dream of your freedom from all that binds and your homecoming to the truth of who you are.
are for you to hear as well. For each of us to hear and to dissolve and become alive -- freedom, freedom, freedom.
I was challenged by a friend at dinner the other night saying "Delayne, what are you going to do when your house is done?" At first I panicked and then truth came out of my mouth, so clearly, when I said, " I'm going to do my art that wants to come alive and I'm going to do everything I can to support, build and contribute to the orphanage in this village". Meme, the missionary who is trying to make this orphanage happen was at the table also. She looked at me with her mouth wide open, astounded, and she started to cry. She knew I was telling the truth. That is my soul contract -- to help the boys in this area who have no one, no where to go, no love in their lives. And each action I take, I will remember to stay awake at the wheel. Each life I touch will touch Nichole's life as well. We are all in this together.
I am touched beyond words with what you, Gene and David have shared about your experience this week. The coldness, the harshness of prison can be penetrated by love and compassion. Slowly with one glance, one statement, one prayer, "the system" gets impacted.
Is there some way Nichol can read your words from last night's blog? She needs to read this, she wants to read this.
All my love is flowing your way today.
I love you. I love Nichol.
Delayne
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